Two years ago I started a fundraiser to start a cat shelter. I have a track record as a cat rescuer and foster, I seem to be well regarded and known enough that I get calls to help cats at least three or four times a week. But I barely raised two lakh over a year, all of which I ploughed into vet and food bills after I pulled the plug on my plan. The thing is, I thought there was a community that values my work and saw the need to take it to the next level. But I'm not the one to inspire that faith, work that hustle, make that dream happen. What did I learn? Mostly I don't take people that seriously anymore. Most of them are just making polite noises when they say they appreciate me. They're just relieved someone else is helping this cat so they don't have to. They usually don't mean it when they say they want to help me. They'd like to do something cute and symbolic for me and move on. I now know better. I don't believe people as much as I used to. I don't plan big or dream at all. We don't seem to talk enough about these stories. We want inspiration. But what about the people who just go on without ever having a success story? I think there's more of us than the other kind. That we plodders maybe even quietly be doing more than ones on the grandstand. Or I'm just trying to feel better about my failure. Most of what we do is a way to feel good about ourselves or feel less bad. I don't think I should take myself very seriously either.
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